What’s Wrong With “Don’t Worry; Be Happy!” Work Advice?

What is the worst advice you have ever been given?

I was relaying a story to a friend recently regarding some advice my father received from a prison chaplain years ago.

Prior to his incarceration, my dad had met a woman who shared his struggles with alcohol addiction. This was something my dad wrestled with himself for years and was the root cause of his imprisonment. In some cases, people make bad decisions because they refuse to listen to advice and exhortations. But in my father’s situation, he took bad advice from someone he expected to guide him in the right direction. A chaplain.

As you’ll see, this specific mindset can cause issues in our work lives and heartbreak in our personal lives. I’m talking about the “Don’t worry; be happy” mindset.

Some Surprisingly Bad Advice

While in prison, my dad sobered up and turned to the Lord for help. He was growing by leaps and bounds, and his release was near. His girlfriend wanted him to move in with her as soon as he got out of prison. Intellectually, he knew this was not a wise decision, but it conflicted with his emotional attachment.

So he turned to a prison chaplain for help. You know what his advice was?

“God just wants you to be happy, and if that would make you happy, you should do it.”

REALLY?

Unfortunately, that’s all my dad needed to hear. When he was released, he made the foolish choice to accept the chaplain’s advice. It was only a matter of time before his addictions took hold of him. He moved in with the person he thought would make him happy, which then sent his life into a downward spiral from which he never recovered.

An Example Relating to Our Work

To most, the foolishness of my dad’s choice probably seems self-evident. Yet we can easily head down that same road chasing after that same elusive happiness. Do what makes you happy. On the surface, it makes sense. It feels right. And we often latch onto this mindset in much more subtle ways than my father did.

For instance, if there are elements about our work or leadership responsibilities that are painful, challenging, and totally draining, we could conclude that such circumstances are keeping us from being fulfilled or happy. The next step is to disregard those responsibilities because they “don’t make us happy.”

Such discontent could also lead us to assume that we’re not doing things God’s way or that we have somehow missed God’s call on our lives and are serving Him in the wrong vocation (or in the wrong way in our vocation). The first premise here is that God’s first desire is for us to be happy in an immediate, self-gratifying way. But is that what scripture says?

Holiness Trumps Happiness

God isn’t anti-happiness. There are many examples in life and scripture that show faithful people enjoying God’s blessings and expressing deep joy. However, it could also be true that God might want to use the current challenges you and I face in our work to make us more HOLY instead of HAPPY. Consider the following verse:

“Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship.” (Romans 12:1) NIV

In my father’s case, his pursuit of happiness went counter to Paul’s encouragement to be holy and pleasing to God. And in this way, many of us make happiness our God. An idol.

Making Wise and Holy Choices

If we view our entire lives as a sacrifice of praise and worship, offered to God out of thankfulness for whom He is and what He has done, then our work life can be one of the largest platforms for God to perfect His holiness in us. When that kind of surrender takes place, then the fleeting pursuit of happiness can be replaced by a deep, abiding joy that transcends our circumstances. Yes, I’m making a distinction between happiness and joy. I’m equating happiness with immediate gratification and putting what feels good first. But joy is lasting and rooted in unchanging truths.

So, in the next week, try this…

Schedule a few moments today, during a break, or at the end of your day to make a bullet point list of things that are draining your joy/happiness bucket.

Then present them to God by telling Him exactly what each one is causing you to think or feel. This is a way to process our emotions in a godly way, just as David models for us in many of the Psalms.

Finally, ask God to reveal to you what aspects of His holiness He might want to forge in your life and your leadership through each work challenge you are facing. Offer yourself anew to Him as a sacrifice of praise. Tell God how you want to be a pleasing vessel to Him. Ask Him for His help to allow Him to perfect His holiness in you through your current work challenges. Then enter into His mysterious joy!

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*Image used with permission. *